Saturday, September 3, 2011

Blog Chain: A Dark And Stormy Night... Sort Of

Yep. I'm at it again this week, folks. Another blog chain post!

This time, the super fab Christine asks us to join her in a writing prompt:

Since we are all writers, I thought it was about time for us to stretch our creative muscles and do a little writing. So, take the following topic and go crazy! Show us what you've got. Your story can be as long or as short as you choice.

The topic: A dark and stormy night.

For this post, I've chosen an excerpt from my YA paranormal romance (which is now shelved, but I still heart it! I've been thinking about changing the genre and premise, but keeping the characters. *ponders*). It's a brief (barely edited) scene, and it ends in a cliffhanger-ish moment, so I apologize in advance!

Le excerpt:  

The gravestones glimmered as raindrops polished the marble. My hands throbbed from climbing over the cemetery gates, which were locked due to the late midnight hour.
One day ended while another begun.
Shuddering, I walked deeper into the graveyard, a shower of rain engulfing me in the cruelest degree of cold. If I didn’t hurry, chances were I’d have to swim through a swamp.
I found the spot where Vincent summoned Morgana, convincing myself to look away from the headstones and up at the sky. All I could see were small white dots on a black velvet mantel--it seemed like every star in the universe had come to witness this.
Guessed they were all subscribed to Gossip Girl: The Galaxy Edition.
Focus, I told myself, just focus.
Closing my eyes, I beckoned my body to relax underneath the downpour.
Which didn’t work. I shivered from the cold and the wave of nerves crashing over me.
I pushed back Vincent’s face. I erased the memories of my family, of the sun-kissed island I used to call home, of the friends I’d made and lost.
Balthazar’s instructions rang loud and clear: just Call to her wherever Vincent summons her. And then, you wait.
“Morgana,” I said as loudly as my voice would allow, “vindicatum meus animus!"
“Morgana!” I yelled, eyes pressed shut. “I'll do it, okay? Come down here and take it already!”
The sky rumbled, a symphony of doom above me.
My nostrils detected a strong scent overpowering that of the damp earth.
Opening my eyes, I searched for the pale horse among the clouds.
The flaming pet galloped to the ground, magically untouched by the rain falling around it.
Morgana rode on top of him, onyx hair whipping in the wind.

That's it! Hope it's not too sucktastic. :)

Go check out Abby's post from yesterday, and make sure to head over to Sandra's blog for her post tomorrow! 

Now tell me: any dark and stormy nights in your WIP? 


  1. Great cliffhanger! Now I want to know what the MC is willing to give up and what could be important enough to change her mind. :)

  2. loved it! these are all so good, loving this topic! :D

  3. Thanks, ladies! It was weird to go back to an old WIP for this prompt, but I loved digging through it again! Lots of LOL moments, for sure :)

  4. Always good to end at a point where readers want to find out what happened next!

  5. Hey, great job! Typically, I am not a paranormal fan, but the way you wrote this tidbit made me want to keep reading. I would say a genre shift would not be too hard for you because you're already drawing from several just in this excerpt.

  6. I liked it! Nice and creepy. Also, you have awesome character names.

  7. Nope to it being sucktastic! Love this! I think it should make a return from the shelf :)

  8. Great stuff here. I especially like the way you handle the internal dialogue, the way the mind drifts when focus is really what is needed. It definitely helps us get an idea who the character is. Nothing sucktastic here - just great writing.

  9. Thank you all so, so much!! You are WAY too nice!!

    *wipes tears*


  10. Oooh! Something seriously awesome is about to go down there. I wish I could read more!

  11. Definitely a cliff-hanger! I'm wondering if she's forfeiting her soul after those magical dark names (Balthazar and Morgana)and your MC yelling, "Come down here and take it already!" Very intrigued! I agree with Lindsay. Take it off the shelf!

  12. I like it - definitely seems like an MS worth dusting off and reworking!

  13. Nice. You've got some good imagery and the internal narrative works really well for this MC. Definitely consider pulling this MS out of the trunk.